There must be no doubts,
no questions
about how you ended up like this.
If you want to submit totally
then it must be you
who makes yourself utterly helpless.
When it's too much
and you wish you could beg for mercy,
I want you to know
that you did this to yourself.
When it's done,
you will have given away all control.
There is no obedience or punishment
when you are immobilized and utterly vulnerable.
You will be ready for use without respect.
Unable to maintain a shred of dignity.
I am waiting for you
when you come into the room.
I place my finger on your lips.
There will be no explanation or discussion.
My instructions were clear and simple.
On a table in the corner of the room
are numbered boxes,
laid out in order.
Each one will bring you closer to submission.
In the first box, you find a ring gag.
The first thing you must give me
is your ability to communicate.
This the most humiliating piece.
More importantly it isolates you from me.
You cannot ask me for help.
You cannot ask me for commands.
You cannot blame anyone but yourself
for what happens.
You make eye contact with me
as you place the ring in your mouth,
buckling the strap behind your head.
I can't tell if that is supposed to be
for your benefit or mine.
You turn back to the table.
The next box contains a butt plug and lube.
Nothing especially big.
It is a symbol of your submission
and a sign of things to come.
It takes some time for you to get it fully inside,
drooling a little as you do.
This time you keep your eyes lowered.
Do you feel shame doing this to yourself?
The third box has a pair of nipple clamps
on a short chain.
A note reads "connect to gag".
You carefully attach the first clamp.
I hear the sharp intake of breath
as it bites into you.
You hesitate a little with the second one.
It's easier when someone else is doing it,
then you just have to endure.
I want you to be responsible.
You take a breath and attach the second clamp.
The chain is short.
There's not a lot of slack.
As you pull it towards the gag,
the pain intensifies.
Tucking your chin and lowering your head,
you manage to hook the chain in place.
Keeping your head low,
the pain is bearable.
The last box has a pair of spreader bars.
You attach the longer one to your ankles.
The shorter one, just above the knees.
With the butt plug in,
you cannot sit down to do this.
You keep tugging on that chain
as you're bent over, reaching.
I enjoy hearing you moan and gasp.
Hurting yourself as you struggle
to give away more and more of your freedom.
You're drooling heavily by the end of it.
You don't turn around when you're done.
A note at the end of the table reads "curtain".
The curtain is right beside you.
You draw it back to reveal
a metal chain that runs from a pulley at the top of the wall
to another pulley near the floor and back up again.
Attached to the chain near the ground,
is a black leather collar.
A leather thong connects it to a pair of metal handcuffs.
I've put this on you many times.
Now it's your turn.
Even at this stage, you could back out.
Nothing is stopping you from undoing everything.
You are still a person
with your own power and will.
Not for long.
You pull on the chain
but it doesn't move.
You will have to get down there
to put on the collar.
Using the wall and table,
you carefully lower yourself to the ground.
More gasps and moans as you haltingly make your way down.
You shuffle around on all-fours.
You fold your knees and lean forward
until the collar is close.
You wrap it around your neck
and fasten the buckle.
You reach over your shoulder
and place the cold metal cuffs on your bare back.
You pause.
A thread of drool connects your mouth to the floor.
Are you waiting for a command?
It will not come.
I will not take your power from you,
you must give every last piece of it away.
I will not turn you into an animal,
a thing,
a squirming, grunting collection of holes and flesh
to be fucked and used in the most degrading ways.
You must do that to yourself.
You bring both hands up behind your back.
You find the cuffs,
taking one in each hand.
The leather connecting them to the collar is not long.
One cuff click-click-clicks on your wrist.
This is it.
You struggle a little to get the other cuff on.
Every movement brings pain.
It clicks into place.
You pull your hands apart to confirm.
You try to relax your arms
but when you do,
the collar presses into your throat
making your breath raspy.
What have you done?
You walked in here a person
and without a word from me
you have turned yourself into a drooling, moaning creature.
Every hole stretched wide.
Every ounce of freedom given away.
I stay where I am,
savouring your condition,
your helplessness,
your growing uncertainty.
What have you done?
I will let you think about that a little longer
as you drool and pant and shift your weight
trying to find a way to get comfortable.
Why bother?
You know what's coming.
I walk over
carrying a crop in one hand.
You are folded over,
Head down, ass up.
I release the brake on the pulley
and slowly pull down on one side of the chain.
The other side rises.
The collar pulls you up by the neck.
Your body unfolds.
You keep your head down
trying to save your nipples.
You are up on your knees now.
Your body fully straight.
I keep pulling.
You shuffle awkwardly,
coming as close as you can to the chain.
Still I'm pulling.
Until now,
the collar was pulled back
by the weight of your arms behind you.
Now it's rising up on your neck
pulling your chin up
and with it, the cruel chain leading to your nipples.
Your breath is coming fast, hard and noisy.
I hold you here, dangling, gasping.
You're looking up at me,
an attempt to communicate.
I do not meet your gaze.
Maybe you think that if I see the pain in your eyes
the begging, the promise of obedience,
I will relent.
That is not the game we are playing now.
You are not an unruly slave
who withholds their gifts until disciplined.
You have nothing to withhold.
I look down and engage the brake on the pulley.
I admire your body, stretched long.
Your hips thrust forward,
as you struggle to make yourself taller,
teetering back and forth
on the edge of balance.
You legs spread wide,
completely defenseless.
I wet my finger in your mouth
and rub it slowly around your lips.
I hold it in the centre of the ring.
Your tongue rises to meet it.
This is all you have left.
The only way you can express yourself.
Lick or not lick.
What are you now?
Your tongue circles my finger
caressing it, seducing it.
Trying to hold my attention.
Offering pleasure.
Begging for relief.
Don't bother.
The tongue of the crop
cracks against your crotch.
All you can do is grunt.
Your body jerks
but you stay upright.
Are you worried?
I understand but
it does no good to fret
when there's nothing you can do.
I brush your hair away from your sweaty forehead.
My fingers run along your scalp.
The crop strikes again.
No harder than last time
but those parts are already inflamed
and the pain is additive.
I grab a fist-full of hair behind your head and pull back.
The fiery pain in your nipples
brings a loud, long moan
as the chain pulls hard.
The moan turns to a desperate gurgle
and then silence
as I push my cock past your begging tongue
and plunge it into your throat.
You did this.